Mac Heaven

My Mac is dead. At least its hard drive is. A couple of days ago I was busy finding a new pot roast recipe when all of a sudden my screen went gray and a spinning wheel appeared. This is the way my computer has stayed ever since. After a bit of a dissection from a techie friend, the prognosis is not good. It appears that my hard drive has crashed and all is gone. :(

I would be about 1 million times more upset if my handyman hadn't been his usual "safety 1st" self about 2 weeks ago where he suggested putting all the pictures that I have saved on my computer onto our media center as well. Just in case, he said. Well...here we find ourselves in just such a case. All the pictures we have of our house building project, and MUCH more importantly, Colin...from our first ultrasound up to a few days ago, were housed on the very same mac that has gone to mac heaven. Had we not copied them to the media center, they would be gone forever. I cannot even imagine how upsetting that would have been. Yes, I lost recipes, addresses, bookmarks (I love my bookmarks!), and many, many lists, however none of those matter. They are all replaceable. I can find new recipes, re-bookmark my bookmarks, and work on recreating my lists, but the pictures, well they are just far too special to imagine losing.

Technology is amazing and digital cameras are obviously far more logical than traditional film cameras. However, there is something to be said for taking pictures the "old fashioned" way. The only person I know who to this day chooses a film camera is my Grandmother. Even though she has a digital camera that my Grandfather used to use, she continually chooses to load & develop her film. From this day on, I will never question her method as I know the memories she is capturing will never be lost on a laptop and will never disappear to technology heaven. Today's brush with losing all those pictures was a little too close for comfort & from now on I will never balk at my handyman's suggestions to transfer files & pictures to another location.

I am a converted computer backer-upper from this day on.

Conclusion.

When I started this blog, its main purpose was to document the process of building our house. I knew that there were many people, both family and friends who would not be able to see the house as it developed and wanted them to be able to experience each stage with us. The title of this blog "Clarence Road Project" was really that - the project of building our home. Since moving in, and the addition of our little man, this blog has taken on another life and another purpose.

The project we know as Clarence Rd is still ongoing. Cupboard doors will be installed soon, the garage is still progressing and the fireplace wall has a long to-do list. The basement isn't finished and there are about 4 rooms waiting for tile. And don't even get me started on what awaits for us when the snow melts outside (hint - about 4 acres of clud (my word for the clay/mud we have the joy of working with)).

As we were busy with our home, a new project arose and has monopolized this blog ever since September 1st when a 7lb 11 oz baby boy rocked our worlds. We have now set forth on a new project...the project of parenting, of growing a family, of getting older...basically the project of our lives. I love that even though this blogs purpose, and the majority of its contents have shifted gears somewhat, the title still makes complete sense. This is our Clarence Road Project but it now extends far beyond this house and its progress.

The project is now us.

Ink.

Tomorrow is my Grandpa's birthday. Even though he left us this past summer, parts of him continue to feel present, day in and day out. Grandpa was a writer. A very good writer. The type of writing that you have to read slowly in order to fully grasp his message. Mostly political pieces, where his opinion came through very strongly and you never had to guess what his true feelings really were. They were there, in ink. I admire so much his ability and willingness to publish his thoughts for all to read, even though they were sometimes not the most popular amongst his readers. I think it is so fitting that I am here today, writing more than I have ever before. It has always been something that I like to do, and now, with this blog, I have the capsule to do it in. I think he would like that.

I also think he would like this home. The wood in this house makes me think of him everyday. In addition to being a writer, he was also a gifted handyman and carpenter. He spent hundreds of hours in his workshop at the lake making countless gifts for all his children and grandchildren. There were jewellery boxes, card holders, reindeer plant holders, just to name a few. They were all perfectly crafted and stamped with his personal touch. I still have many of the things he made me and they are all in near perfect condition. Just like the memories we have of his gentle spirit and joyfulness, the pieces he created will never tarnish, never break, never age.

The quote that appears as you enter our home actually came from Grandma and Grandpa's wedding book. It was said at their wedding and it is read each and every day here. Without love, this house is simply a structure, a combination of wood and steel and concrete. Love creates the magic that we experience every day while watching our family grow and enjoying time together. Love makes the tough times easier, the great times fantastic and the every day more special that I could have ever hoped for.

Boobies

From an 85 year old man, to an 85 year old woman....at least some parts look like an 85 year old woman.

Just in case.

I often ask my Mom or my mother in law questions about whether or not their kids went through certain stages as an infant. Questions like when they sprouted their first teeth, how the slept and whether or not they "played strange" are samples. Understandably, their answer is often "I really don't remember". After all, it was a minimum of 20 years ago or longer since our mothers were in the stage that my Handyman and I are in now with our little man. I can completely understand their lack of memory for the small details as even I have a hard time remembering what it was like 4 months ago when we first brought him home. I know I was up a lot in the night, I know I was tired, but the specifics have definitely vanished from my memory.

So just in case I ever forget this time, at 20 weeks old today, here it is in writing, for everyone to see and for me to remind myself of later....this is hard. At times I feel like someone has switched babies with me. Where we once had a good nighttime sleeper and decent daytime sleeper, we now have a restless baby 24 hours a day who seems to be all over the map when it comes to sleep. By doing some reading, I know that this is all because of the huge developmental milestones he is working through right now, becoming aware of his surroundings, moving & depth perception, however, that does not make me any better rested. Not that books know it all, but where they say we should be at 3 naps a day, we somehow find ourselves still at 5, sometimes 6 and none of those are what I would call "quality". When he was born, my Mom told me that just when you think you have things figured out, everything changes and this is no exception. Let's hope the next change is one for the better as figuring this stage out is proving to be the most difficult yet.

I guess the motto continues....this too shall pass.

It better :).

From this day on.

This weekend, I was lucky enough to attend the annual Kitchen & Bath show at the convention centre. More specifically, I was able to attend a presentation by Sarah Richardson. For those of you who don't know who that is, please get to know her. You will not regret it. Sarah has a variety of TV shows on HGTV dealing with home design and renovations. I have followed her for the past 3 or 4 years and absolutely love her sense of style and humor. She is one of those designers that even though there are things she does that I would never do, nor would ever put in my house, they are ALL still beautiful. Her choices have inspired many of my choices for our home and continues to help pick some of the finishes we still need to select and complete.

Although I loved the hour I spent with her, I left feeling a little deflated, knowing how much work there is still to be done on our home and that realistically, it won't be done for quite some time. I so desperately want our house to be completed mostly because I want everyone else to experience just how beautiful it will be. Currently, that beauty is only in my imagination and I am so excited to be able to share that with all our friends and family.

It wasn't until today that I finally had to give my head a shake. Finished or not, this home is amazing. I do not deserve it and it serves us better than we would ever really need. There is a place for everything and we are all warm and protected. It cooks our meals and cleans our clothes. It is a place to play, to relax and to visit. It is all we could ever need...at this exact moment and forever. Things will simply be completed in their own time and that is that. We have better things to focus on these days like growing little people and wonderful puppies who both make me smile countless times a day.


From this day on, I will simply appreciate and admire. I will relax and enjoy. I will explore and utilize every inch of this amazing home. I will look forward to what is to come, but I will also remember that we have all the time in the world to complete each space. For now, I will just be young and in love with the most amazing boys a girl could ask for. I think I can live like this forever.

Mini Handyman

Warmer days ahead...right?

For the past two mornings, the eastern sky has greeted me with a beautiful sunrise.



It is so quiet on Clarence these days, as the snow continues to fall, and winter continues to affect our motivation to get outside. However, the days are already getting longer and soon enough we will be able to venture out to explore each inch of our 3.86 acres so that we can properly introduce ourselves to the space we simply barged in on last summer. Although we will have quite a bit of cold before the warmth arrives, it is so exciting to think about a summer without 16 hour work days and hundreds of trips to route 90. I can't wait to spend more time outside with our little man & my handyman, especially since the little one won't need to be bundled to the max in order to do so.

There is another member of this family looking forward to warmer weather as well. Since it has been so cold out lately, some of us have had trouble getting out of bed in the morning...


The 3 of us are lucky enough to have been invited to Disney World this summer, and tacked on to a week at a beautiful condo will make 2 weeks of bliss. Just the thought of the beach, sun, family & immense amount of fun that I am sure we will have makes winter not seem so bad. After all, it won't last forever and even though summers around here are short, we have learned to enjoy each and every second. This year, especially after the past couple have been whirlwinds, that is definitely the plan.

Officially Massive.

This past week, my little man and I visited his doctor to get up to date on his vaccinations and get his skin looked at again. We both passed with flying colours. Hardly any tears with the shots and a rave review on how much better his skin looks made me very happy. He was also weighed and tipped the scales at 19lbs 8oz. We are officially massive. I realize now that I am that Mom who people make fun of for having a gigantic baby. I guess we just breed them solid on Clarence.


Over the holidays we welcomed a wonderful Auntie and Uncle from out east and were able to spend a few days with them. Although we wish they were closer to us so we could visit more often, we are so excited for them and the life they have created and are continuing to create for themselves in Halifax.


Around these parts we are extremely close to rolling over...so very, very close. It goes a little something like this...our little man heaves himself over (always to the left) to the point where he is 98% on his stomach, then screams when he realizes he can't go any further. We repeat this all day long :). With a little help from someone else, he spends a lot of happy times on his stomach...and I'm sure soon he will be able to do it no problem.


Time is flying by around here. There are new discoveries each and every day and although my little man does not feel so little anymore, it's nice to know that he still has a lot of growing to do.

A New Perspective.

A couple of days ago, while at my parents house, I started to look through our old family picture albums, something I do from time to time. A few years ago, my Mom spent a great deal of time changing the regular photo albums into scrapbook type books so they are all organized by year, but also by events such as Christmas', birthdays and trips.

As I looked through the books, I became overwhelmed with gratitude that my parents took as many pictures as they did while we were growing up. I love looking at the 3 of us kids, on trips, at parties and just playing and hanging out together. Even more though, I love looking at my parents 30+years ago. It is so interesting for me to imagine them, at the stage of their life that my handyman and I are in now with our little man. We are in fact, the exact same age as my parents were when my brother was born. In the first pictures my parents have with my brother, they look so sure of themselves, so under control, like experts. However, I'm sure if I could dive into those pictures and be back in March of 1977, they would actually be quite the same as we are today. Unsure, nervous and second guessing what is the right thing for their little man. Through all the questions and concerns, it calms me to know that EVERY parent, including mine who in my mind were and are perfect parents, have gone through this stage, especially with their 1st born.

Another thing I noticed, while flipping through the photo albums is that there are almost no pictures of my Mom and I just the two of us. I decided that this is the case for two reasons. For one, she made the books and I'm sure (just as I do a lot of time), left out some pictures with her in them purposely because she didn't like the way she looked in them :). But secondly, and much more importantly, it was because she was the one taking the majority of the pictures. She was the one creating the memories, planning the trips, and organizing activities for us to take part in. So although she may not be in many of the pictures, my own memories are the proof that she was there...every Christmas, every birthday, every game, every DAY. I did find this one picture though...

It was taken with a polaroid camera so I'm not too sure who took it as I don't think we ever had one...but I love it. I am probably just over 2 years old here.

I have always loved pictures...loved taking them, loved looking at them. I often look through the pictures we have of our little man on my computer, just to see the changes in him over the past 4 months. Since having him, I look at pictures with even more importance as I now want to make sure I capture all the milestones and special days we have with him. I want him to be able to look back and see how he looked as a baby, but also how his Dad and I look as well. This year, I want to make sure we get lots of pictures of the 3 of us together, lots of each of us with him, and lots of him. The more the better. I hope that one day he will cherish the pictures I have taken, just as I do with the ones my Mom took.

A long way from where we started.

My handyman has enjoyed the past few weeks at home and will return to school on Thursday of this week. It has been amazing to have him around for many reasons, but mostly just because it is so much fun to spend time as a family. We were able to visit with lots of family, run some errands (which is so much more fun together), as well as get some small things done around the house. Christmas is all cleaned up now on Clarence Road and it feels good to have a fresh, clean house going into 2011. 2010 was a very special year for my handyman and I for 2 very big reasons. 5203 Clarence Road is still a work in progress but considering where we came from the original plans to digging the hole on June 12th to the way we know it today, it has come a LONG way...




Our other BIG project of 2010 has also come a long way. He started very, very small, and although he is still small compared to you and I, he is a big, big boy.





2010 was filled with many amazing changes & additions for my handyman and I. It was also a year where we said goodbye to some amazing Grandparents who will be forever missed. I wish so much that they could still be here to experience all the wonderfulness my handyman and I have been blessed with, however am so happy that they are someplace better where illnesses and pains are things of the past.

I am so excited to see what 2011 has in store for us. If it is anything like 2010, I know it will be busy, but also full of love & pure joy.

Happy New Year to you all, from all of us on Clarence.