Dear Colin,
A few days ago, you turned 4 years old. You, my friend, are a pretty cool kid and I am reminded of this on a daily basis. When I started writing these letters to you, you were only 3 months old and I was exhausted and discouraged. You challenged me in every way possible and I am happy to report that 4 years later, we have very much found our groove together. Over this past year, it has become clearer than ever what your likes, dislikes, challenges, sense of humour and ultimately, your overall personality truly is.
You are so very, very kind. The patience and kindness that you have with your sisters (yes, you now have two!) warms my heart on a daily basis. You constantly compromise your wants and needs for Addy and are always looking for ways to help with Aubrey. Lately, when Aubrey cries in the car, you have decided that singing "Old McDonald had a farm" (although you sing "Old McDonald's) will help soothe her. You and Addy's rendition makes me laugh every time, even over the stress of how it feels when a baby is screaming in the car.
You are such a good friend. We are so lucky to have so many fun boys right around our house for you to play with and I love watching you with them. Your cousins are a few other of your favourites and you love every second of every time we have to spend with them. You look up to your cousin Cole so much, which makes me so very happy as he is a pretty great kid.
You thrive on consistency and rules. Now this one is not new around here as ever since rules became a part of our lives, you have needed them and craved them. Today, this remains the same. A few weeks ago you started nursery school and I can tell that school is right up your ally. The routine and the structure is what makes you tick and you have instantly fallen in love with the idea of school.
You love to learn & have a mind that remembers and absorbs so much. Especially over the past few months, your curiosity and desire to learn about everything and anything has exploded. You ask me a million questions a day about just as many subjects. How things work and outer-space seem to be your favourite. Thank goodness for google because honestly, I don't know the answers to the majority of the questions you ask. "Mom, which planets have water on them?"..."Ummmm....earth....." We'll learn together.
New things are hard for you. Again, not a new one, but something you have really improved on over the past year. Swimming lessons started just after your third birthday and it was a bit of a bust. Week after week though we continued to show up and eventually (like 6 months later) you finally realized that it was nothing to get all worked up over and started to really enjoy the half hour a week. Fast forward to this past summer and you are a swimming machine. You jump off the dock into the lake, swim by yourself with a life jacket and actively enjoy your time in the water. You needed to come to it in your own time and I am so very, very glad that you did.
You continue to challenge me. It has been a bit of a mixed bag around here as Aubrey was only born a few months ago and our lives were once again, turned upside down. For the first while, your Dad was home on summer holidays which really lessened the blow, but for the past few weeks it has just been you kids and I, as we attempt to find our groove. As with any mother of a newborn, I am tired and at times have felt frustrated and overwhelmed. To be completely honest, in a few of those moments, I have taken it out on you. This is not fair. You see, you are such a good kid that when you do have your moments, misbehave, or cause problems, sometimes I come down on you a little too hard just because I am not used to it from you. You have set the standard for your own behaviour so high and I need to remind myself sometimes that you still are in fact only 4 years old. You are allowed to make mistakes, to cry for no reason and not always want to compromise with your sister who is always pushing your buttons. I have gotten angry with you when really, you were just being 4 and I should have had more patience, been more calm, and talked you through the problem. I saw a quote the other day and I loved it - "Only I can give my kids a happy mother who loves life." Reading these few words snapped me into the reality of their truth. Yes, I have three children under the age of 5 now. And yes, I am tired. And yes, our house is always littered with toys. And yes, our days do not always go perfectly and the tears flow. That all being said, the last thing I want is to take those things out on you for you, my sweet boy are the first tiny human who made all of it worth it. Your unconditional love, even on my most unreasonably touchy days is an amazing example of its true definition. Although I do have a job to do with you and your sisters, a job that is not always fun and you will not always like (think manners, rules, cleaning up, etc), I ultimately want you all to know that you make me incredibly happy. The happiness that you bring to my days, to my life, and to my soul reach farther and deeper than I knew existed.
Bucky, you are my bestest boy. Your heart is so good and your soul is so sweet and pure. You have been blessed with two little sisters who I know will push you (maybe even over the edge from time to time), but will also protect you with all their hearts. They already look up to you so much and it is so clear as to why. You are the best brother and they are so lucky to have you. For me, I could not ask for a better boy, kid, son. I could not be more proud of you. For everything you have become already and for everything I am certain you will become. You have so many amazing times ahead of you. Thank you for keeping me so close yet embracing your own independence and freedom as you grow.
This birthday interview, once again, solidifies exactly you at this moment. A little bit calm, a little bit silly, a little bit typical 4 year old boy. Here is to you, at 4.
Love x4, to the moon & back.
Mama
xoxox
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Sunday, August 10, 2014
One.
Dear Aubrey,
Exactly one month ago, you were born. I wrote your brother and sister these types of letters and I promise to do the same for you. My hope is that one day you will enjoy reading them, that it will tell you a little about your first years of life and remind you that from the second you were born, you were loved & adored.
My dearest child, you were late. 10 days late in fact. Let it be known that for the next 100 years, each and every time you are late I will remind you that it is in fact how you came into the world. I did not enjoy waiting around for those 10 extra days, but looking back on it now, on the other side of it all, I am glad that we had them. You see, your Dad was on summer holidays and because we were hopefully having a baby any minute of any day, nobody really expected anything of us. For this reason, we were able to have some last minute fun with your brother and sister and take them in a little more before life slowed down and we started all over. We did a lot of fun things in those ten extra days, and I promise that next summer, they will all include you.
When you finally decided it was time to meet face to face, you did not waste any time and for that, I thank you. If you are lucky enough to be blessed with a child one day, I hope and pray that you experience the pregnancies and labours that I do. For the most part, you took it easy on me and although the process of birthing a child is pretty much the worst thing ever, you at least spared me in its duration.
The first thing I thought of when you were born was that I could not believe that you were a girl. Even though I would have been thrilled to have a boy, if I'm being honest here I did want a girl. The moment the doctor announced you were a girl I felt incredibly unworthy. It was almost too amazing to believe as ultimately I got everything I wanted. When your brother was born I wanted a boy. When your sister was born, I wanted a girl. To think that we went 3/3 was and is almost too much. Your father and I have been blessed beyond measure - you capped it all off.
Your first few days in this world were like most with a newborn - a mixed bag. For the most part you were quite relaxed and content, however, like there always seem to be with tiny humans, you and I had a few moments. About 4 days after we brought you home, I could feel the exhaustion and emotion building up inside of me. Newborns are tough and I felt like my life had once again overnight become a never ending stream of endless nights and busy days with no time left for me or any real down time. It all came to a head one night and all I could do was cry. Your Dad bore the job of letting me vent, pulling me close and reassuring me that things would get better. I have to be honest, the cry felt good. A few minutes later you woke up from a nap. When I picked you up, for the first time, you really looked at me. Your eyes were wide and clear and your gaze met mine. At that moment, it was like your heart spoke to me and I realized what all the exhaustion and stress is for. I gave in right then and there and embraced what will be our lives for the next little while. Sure there will still be moments where I will long for some freedom and for the consistency that will come over time, however I know that it is all a process and that we will get there. For now, I will just enjoy your newness, your innocence, and the quiet sweetness you seem to radiate.
It is a different feeling, this time around with you than I had with your brother and sister. You, my sweet girl, are my last baby. I knew that going into the pregnancy and the ten months you spent brewing inside of me and the 90 minutes you spend being born solidified that I was done. The shop is closed. You have completed us.
I don't know much about you yet, except that you seem to understand that you are not the only one demanding my time and attention around here. You are patient and kind and have allowed us to carry on with some normalcy this past month. Thank you for that. I know your siblings thank you for that as they have not had to sacrifice much since your arrival. You have been portable and gone with the flow in many situations. I know as you wake up a little more this will become harder for you but for now, I will take advantage of your ease.
Speaking of your brother and sister, they really do love you. Colin is very protective of you and Addy is obsessed with knowing where you are and what you are doing. They have both been super sweet and dotted on you since the moment you were born. I am sure that as you grow and become an equal player around here you three will have your moments, however for now, they could not love you more.
Littlest one, you are a dream. I look at you and dream about the person you will become. I wonder what will make you you. I wonder what will make you happiest and what will drive you crazy. I wonder if you will be sensitive like your brother, dramatic like your sister, or some new kind of crazy we don't even know about yet. I wonder if you will clutch onto a stuffed animal like your brother and sister do with Eeyore and Baby. I wonder if you will talk my ear off or need to have details pried out of you. I wonder so much about who you will be and what will drive you. Those dreams and that wonder is what makes this crazy ride so incredibly worth it. No matter how long the days might be, or even longer the nights seem to drag, building a person is unlike anything else. There is no better gift and no more rewarding a job. You have been in-trusted to us and I commit everything I am and everything I have to you. You have made our family complete, shaken it all up once again, and started another new chapter in our lives. This is to you, baby girl, and to forever as my love for you is one with no beginning and no end. I am yours.
Love you x1,
Mama
xoxo
Exactly one month ago, you were born. I wrote your brother and sister these types of letters and I promise to do the same for you. My hope is that one day you will enjoy reading them, that it will tell you a little about your first years of life and remind you that from the second you were born, you were loved & adored.
My dearest child, you were late. 10 days late in fact. Let it be known that for the next 100 years, each and every time you are late I will remind you that it is in fact how you came into the world. I did not enjoy waiting around for those 10 extra days, but looking back on it now, on the other side of it all, I am glad that we had them. You see, your Dad was on summer holidays and because we were hopefully having a baby any minute of any day, nobody really expected anything of us. For this reason, we were able to have some last minute fun with your brother and sister and take them in a little more before life slowed down and we started all over. We did a lot of fun things in those ten extra days, and I promise that next summer, they will all include you.
When you finally decided it was time to meet face to face, you did not waste any time and for that, I thank you. If you are lucky enough to be blessed with a child one day, I hope and pray that you experience the pregnancies and labours that I do. For the most part, you took it easy on me and although the process of birthing a child is pretty much the worst thing ever, you at least spared me in its duration.
The first thing I thought of when you were born was that I could not believe that you were a girl. Even though I would have been thrilled to have a boy, if I'm being honest here I did want a girl. The moment the doctor announced you were a girl I felt incredibly unworthy. It was almost too amazing to believe as ultimately I got everything I wanted. When your brother was born I wanted a boy. When your sister was born, I wanted a girl. To think that we went 3/3 was and is almost too much. Your father and I have been blessed beyond measure - you capped it all off.
Your first few days in this world were like most with a newborn - a mixed bag. For the most part you were quite relaxed and content, however, like there always seem to be with tiny humans, you and I had a few moments. About 4 days after we brought you home, I could feel the exhaustion and emotion building up inside of me. Newborns are tough and I felt like my life had once again overnight become a never ending stream of endless nights and busy days with no time left for me or any real down time. It all came to a head one night and all I could do was cry. Your Dad bore the job of letting me vent, pulling me close and reassuring me that things would get better. I have to be honest, the cry felt good. A few minutes later you woke up from a nap. When I picked you up, for the first time, you really looked at me. Your eyes were wide and clear and your gaze met mine. At that moment, it was like your heart spoke to me and I realized what all the exhaustion and stress is for. I gave in right then and there and embraced what will be our lives for the next little while. Sure there will still be moments where I will long for some freedom and for the consistency that will come over time, however I know that it is all a process and that we will get there. For now, I will just enjoy your newness, your innocence, and the quiet sweetness you seem to radiate.
It is a different feeling, this time around with you than I had with your brother and sister. You, my sweet girl, are my last baby. I knew that going into the pregnancy and the ten months you spent brewing inside of me and the 90 minutes you spend being born solidified that I was done. The shop is closed. You have completed us.
I don't know much about you yet, except that you seem to understand that you are not the only one demanding my time and attention around here. You are patient and kind and have allowed us to carry on with some normalcy this past month. Thank you for that. I know your siblings thank you for that as they have not had to sacrifice much since your arrival. You have been portable and gone with the flow in many situations. I know as you wake up a little more this will become harder for you but for now, I will take advantage of your ease.
Speaking of your brother and sister, they really do love you. Colin is very protective of you and Addy is obsessed with knowing where you are and what you are doing. They have both been super sweet and dotted on you since the moment you were born. I am sure that as you grow and become an equal player around here you three will have your moments, however for now, they could not love you more.
Littlest one, you are a dream. I look at you and dream about the person you will become. I wonder what will make you you. I wonder what will make you happiest and what will drive you crazy. I wonder if you will be sensitive like your brother, dramatic like your sister, or some new kind of crazy we don't even know about yet. I wonder if you will clutch onto a stuffed animal like your brother and sister do with Eeyore and Baby. I wonder if you will talk my ear off or need to have details pried out of you. I wonder so much about who you will be and what will drive you. Those dreams and that wonder is what makes this crazy ride so incredibly worth it. No matter how long the days might be, or even longer the nights seem to drag, building a person is unlike anything else. There is no better gift and no more rewarding a job. You have been in-trusted to us and I commit everything I am and everything I have to you. You have made our family complete, shaken it all up once again, and started another new chapter in our lives. This is to you, baby girl, and to forever as my love for you is one with no beginning and no end. I am yours.
Love you x1,
Mama
xoxo
Thursday, August 7, 2014
Aubrey.
This is painfully overdue, but I I owe our newest little girl a proper introduction around here. With her birth comes a new reason to blog and a new commitment to keep documenting our lives.
Aubrey Norma Jean was born at 6:21 p.m. on Thursday, July 10th.
Waking up on her birthday I felt frustrated and exhausted. I was 10 days overdue, scheduled for a second fetal assessment and even though on the list to be induced nowhere near the top. Around lunchtime though I thought I might be starting to feel like we were moving in the right direction. For that reason we headed to my parents in case things really started and we needed to head to the hospital. We spent the afternoon waiting around...something we had gotten pretty good at. Around 4:45 Jason and I decided that enough was enough and if we had a babysitter we may as well go for dinner while we had the opportunity. About a two minutes after leaving my parents house I had my first real contraction and instantly I knew. This baby was coming.
After a quick turnaround we headed to the hospital and before we knew it, our baby girl was in our arms.
Welcome to our crazy life, Aubrey. Here's to you and to us. Our family is complete.
Aubrey Norma Jean was born at 6:21 p.m. on Thursday, July 10th.
Waking up on her birthday I felt frustrated and exhausted. I was 10 days overdue, scheduled for a second fetal assessment and even though on the list to be induced nowhere near the top. Around lunchtime though I thought I might be starting to feel like we were moving in the right direction. For that reason we headed to my parents in case things really started and we needed to head to the hospital. We spent the afternoon waiting around...something we had gotten pretty good at. Around 4:45 Jason and I decided that enough was enough and if we had a babysitter we may as well go for dinner while we had the opportunity. About a two minutes after leaving my parents house I had my first real contraction and instantly I knew. This baby was coming.
After a quick turnaround we headed to the hospital and before we knew it, our baby girl was in our arms.
Welcome to our crazy life, Aubrey. Here's to you and to us. Our family is complete.
Sunday, June 8, 2014
2.
Dear Addy,
A few weeks ago, you turned two years old. You'll have to forgive me for the lateness of this letter, but you see, we have been a touch preoccupied around here lately. I'll explain more about that later.
Over the past year, you have truly transformed. My sweet girl, you started the year off pretty much still a baby in the majority of ways. You couldn't walk, you couldn't talk and for the most part you simply went the flow, without too much to say about anything. As long as you were well rested, you maintained your "angel baby" status. Fast forward 12 months and you are now a full blown toddler. You are everywhere in a flash, you yack it up all day long and you have very definite likes and dislikes.
I can honestly say that after 24ish months of knowing you and being your Mom, I still haven't quite figured you out. You are truly my wild card. I have no idea how you will react in most situations and you are constantly keeping us guessing. There have been (many) times where you have freaked out over nothing and (a few) times where you have been perfect in stressful, overwhelming situations. If there is one thing I do know, and has been solidified in my mind, is that your reaction, attitude and demeanour is decided on by you and only you. You are not easily swayed and once your mind is made up you cannot be convinced otherwise. You are strong, and I love that about you. I know without a doubt that no one will ever push you around and that I very highly doubt that you will be the victim of a bully. You are simply too strong willed, too opinionated and too tough to let any of that get to you.
Now comes my promise to you- I promise that I will help channel that strength and those opinions so that you use them for good. Strength can sometimes veer off into bossiness or a low tolerance for others and even though you are still extremely sweet and good, I promise that if you do turn the other way, I will help bring you back.
Your strength is one of my favourite parts of you. It is also one of the most challenging parts of being your Mom. Your brother, although a tough baby has pretty well been a textbook "easy" child. He enjoys rules, predictability and is an overall simple kid to be around. You, my girl, are anything but simple. If nothing else, you have solidified my theory that the tougher the baby, the easier the child. When Colin was your age, he would instantly cry whenever I would discipline him as he simply couldn't handle me being upset with him. You couldn't care less when I'm mad at you - in fact, sometimes I think you enjoy it and have been known to laugh in my face while I am dealing with you - as you can imagine, that's super fun for me. You want your opinions to be heard louder than anyone else's and struggle with sharing the spotlight or adjusting to others. We are working on this. I have a feeling it will be a major theme of the next year or two (or 15).
There have been a few days lately that have ended in a big teary mess around here and ultimately you are simply placed in bed to work out your own issues. On days like this, about half an hour after you go to bed, I like to go back in your room, sit in the chair with you and enjoy your now calmness and sweetness. You touch my face and talk me through the day - some of which I understand and some of which I don't but I love it all. It is our time to become friends again.
Just like from the day you were born, you love to sleep. This has translated into a love for your bed in general. I couldn't love this trait in you more. You seemingly crave time in your bed. You sleep until awoken, almost every morning and every nap you ever take. Even more, if you do wake up, you lay in your bed, fingers through the holes in your crocheted blanket, not making a sound, until someone comes to get you. I can honestly say that you have not had an issue with a nap or night time sleep since you were about 4 months old - not one. I realize that this is unbelievable and chalk up my luck to the 9 months of no sleep your brother blessed me with. Plus, dealing with you over the past year while awake kind of balances things out :).
Even though you are tough, you are also one of the most polite two year olds I have ever met. In fact, these days I probably remind Colin to say his "pleases" and "thank-you's" more than I do for you. Ever since you could talk, you needed very little if any reminder. It is truly your saving grace at times when I am close to the edge :).
Like I said earlier, we have been a little preoccupied around here. I have been working for the past year and a bit, travelling for work, taking some university courses, and most importantly carrying your new brother or sister who will join our circus in a few short weeks. Just like in most situations, I truly have no idea how you will react to this whole new baby thing. When you were born your brother didn't even seem to notice. I don't expect to have that same sort of reaction from you, but the details of how you will deal with the new baby are a big question mark for me. I know that ultimately you will be an amazing sibling and will be an advocate for them whenever they need it (and also when they don't I'm sure). My Mom and I were talking the other day about the dynamics of our family changing with this new arrival and she commented that I will have to ensure that you don't get lost in the shuffle once the new baby comes. She suggested that you and I still get quality time just the two of us as it will not come as naturally as my time alone with the new baby. I thought about this suggestion afterwards and can totally see how you could get lost without a real effort on my part. Your brother will always get alone time with your Dad and I as he is the oldest and therefore is ready for certain things earlier than you will be. The baby, at least for awhile, will get lots of alone time with me as that just comes with the territory of new babies. Regardless of whether or not this new baby is a girl or boy, I promise that I will carve out time just for the two of us - from now until forever. For now, I love the moments we have together where you make me laugh with your excitement and your stories. For later, I have a feeling that you and I are going to challenge each other, but in the same breath like a lot of the same things and therefore have a lot of fun together. For even later, I can see us being great, great friends. Laughing, loving and supporting each other as I age and you, my sweet girl, grow to be the mountain mover I am convinced you will be. For you see, God does not put that much strength in those who will waste it. It has been placed in you for good reason and I know that you will capitalize on this trait you have been blessed with.
Not that it has ever really sunken in with your brother either, but I am constantly bewildered by the fact that you are ours. It does not always seem real that we would have been blessed with two amazing children and the fact that we are getting one more is almost too good to be true. You are at the stage where basically all I do is direct you, correct you, and discipline you. The fact that you still love me, still choose me, still get excited to see me when I am gone, amazes me. You are such a special part of this family and that will never change. Over the past two years you have challenged us all, made us all laugh countless and countless times over and tried my patience more than I thought it could ever survive. Through it all, you have made me a better Mom, a better person and ultimately given me one more amazing reason to look forward to the rest of my life. To see you grow up, experience the aura that is you and be able to have a front row seat to it all makes me feel like the luckiest person in the world. The show you will put on, my sweet girl, I am convinced will be a blockbuster.
As per tradition around here, here is your 2nd birthday interview. It is a hodgepodge, that is for sure, but it perfectly sums you up today.
Love to you, my girl, my light, my joy. Happiest x2 and for forever.
Love,
Mama
xoxo
A few weeks ago, you turned two years old. You'll have to forgive me for the lateness of this letter, but you see, we have been a touch preoccupied around here lately. I'll explain more about that later.
Over the past year, you have truly transformed. My sweet girl, you started the year off pretty much still a baby in the majority of ways. You couldn't walk, you couldn't talk and for the most part you simply went the flow, without too much to say about anything. As long as you were well rested, you maintained your "angel baby" status. Fast forward 12 months and you are now a full blown toddler. You are everywhere in a flash, you yack it up all day long and you have very definite likes and dislikes.
I can honestly say that after 24ish months of knowing you and being your Mom, I still haven't quite figured you out. You are truly my wild card. I have no idea how you will react in most situations and you are constantly keeping us guessing. There have been (many) times where you have freaked out over nothing and (a few) times where you have been perfect in stressful, overwhelming situations. If there is one thing I do know, and has been solidified in my mind, is that your reaction, attitude and demeanour is decided on by you and only you. You are not easily swayed and once your mind is made up you cannot be convinced otherwise. You are strong, and I love that about you. I know without a doubt that no one will ever push you around and that I very highly doubt that you will be the victim of a bully. You are simply too strong willed, too opinionated and too tough to let any of that get to you.
Now comes my promise to you- I promise that I will help channel that strength and those opinions so that you use them for good. Strength can sometimes veer off into bossiness or a low tolerance for others and even though you are still extremely sweet and good, I promise that if you do turn the other way, I will help bring you back.
Your strength is one of my favourite parts of you. It is also one of the most challenging parts of being your Mom. Your brother, although a tough baby has pretty well been a textbook "easy" child. He enjoys rules, predictability and is an overall simple kid to be around. You, my girl, are anything but simple. If nothing else, you have solidified my theory that the tougher the baby, the easier the child. When Colin was your age, he would instantly cry whenever I would discipline him as he simply couldn't handle me being upset with him. You couldn't care less when I'm mad at you - in fact, sometimes I think you enjoy it and have been known to laugh in my face while I am dealing with you - as you can imagine, that's super fun for me. You want your opinions to be heard louder than anyone else's and struggle with sharing the spotlight or adjusting to others. We are working on this. I have a feeling it will be a major theme of the next year or two (or 15).
There have been a few days lately that have ended in a big teary mess around here and ultimately you are simply placed in bed to work out your own issues. On days like this, about half an hour after you go to bed, I like to go back in your room, sit in the chair with you and enjoy your now calmness and sweetness. You touch my face and talk me through the day - some of which I understand and some of which I don't but I love it all. It is our time to become friends again.
Just like from the day you were born, you love to sleep. This has translated into a love for your bed in general. I couldn't love this trait in you more. You seemingly crave time in your bed. You sleep until awoken, almost every morning and every nap you ever take. Even more, if you do wake up, you lay in your bed, fingers through the holes in your crocheted blanket, not making a sound, until someone comes to get you. I can honestly say that you have not had an issue with a nap or night time sleep since you were about 4 months old - not one. I realize that this is unbelievable and chalk up my luck to the 9 months of no sleep your brother blessed me with. Plus, dealing with you over the past year while awake kind of balances things out :).
Even though you are tough, you are also one of the most polite two year olds I have ever met. In fact, these days I probably remind Colin to say his "pleases" and "thank-you's" more than I do for you. Ever since you could talk, you needed very little if any reminder. It is truly your saving grace at times when I am close to the edge :).
Like I said earlier, we have been a little preoccupied around here. I have been working for the past year and a bit, travelling for work, taking some university courses, and most importantly carrying your new brother or sister who will join our circus in a few short weeks. Just like in most situations, I truly have no idea how you will react to this whole new baby thing. When you were born your brother didn't even seem to notice. I don't expect to have that same sort of reaction from you, but the details of how you will deal with the new baby are a big question mark for me. I know that ultimately you will be an amazing sibling and will be an advocate for them whenever they need it (and also when they don't I'm sure). My Mom and I were talking the other day about the dynamics of our family changing with this new arrival and she commented that I will have to ensure that you don't get lost in the shuffle once the new baby comes. She suggested that you and I still get quality time just the two of us as it will not come as naturally as my time alone with the new baby. I thought about this suggestion afterwards and can totally see how you could get lost without a real effort on my part. Your brother will always get alone time with your Dad and I as he is the oldest and therefore is ready for certain things earlier than you will be. The baby, at least for awhile, will get lots of alone time with me as that just comes with the territory of new babies. Regardless of whether or not this new baby is a girl or boy, I promise that I will carve out time just for the two of us - from now until forever. For now, I love the moments we have together where you make me laugh with your excitement and your stories. For later, I have a feeling that you and I are going to challenge each other, but in the same breath like a lot of the same things and therefore have a lot of fun together. For even later, I can see us being great, great friends. Laughing, loving and supporting each other as I age and you, my sweet girl, grow to be the mountain mover I am convinced you will be. For you see, God does not put that much strength in those who will waste it. It has been placed in you for good reason and I know that you will capitalize on this trait you have been blessed with.
Not that it has ever really sunken in with your brother either, but I am constantly bewildered by the fact that you are ours. It does not always seem real that we would have been blessed with two amazing children and the fact that we are getting one more is almost too good to be true. You are at the stage where basically all I do is direct you, correct you, and discipline you. The fact that you still love me, still choose me, still get excited to see me when I am gone, amazes me. You are such a special part of this family and that will never change. Over the past two years you have challenged us all, made us all laugh countless and countless times over and tried my patience more than I thought it could ever survive. Through it all, you have made me a better Mom, a better person and ultimately given me one more amazing reason to look forward to the rest of my life. To see you grow up, experience the aura that is you and be able to have a front row seat to it all makes me feel like the luckiest person in the world. The show you will put on, my sweet girl, I am convinced will be a blockbuster.
As per tradition around here, here is your 2nd birthday interview. It is a hodgepodge, that is for sure, but it perfectly sums you up today.
Love to you, my girl, my light, my joy. Happiest x2 and for forever.
Love,
Mama
xoxo
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Tradition.
And as per tradition around here, a look through the ages at us with Santa. Some years were more pleasant experiences than others, but they all perfectly sum up our lives at that moment...
2010-
2011-
2012-
2013-
2010-
2011-
2012-
2013-
Merry Christmas to you all & here's to nothing but health, love and joy for 2014!
Monday, October 14, 2013
Letter.
Dear Colin,
Longer than I care to admit ago, you turned 3 years old. I am not sure why it took me so long to write this letter to you. In some ways, it's hard to find the words to describe how much we love you, but in others I could write page after page about all the funny, sweet, caring, crazy, and sometimes frustrating things you do and say on a daily basis. Through it all, at the end of each and EVERY day, you are still, by far, my bestest boy. You stole my heart the moment you were born and to this day you have yet to give it back. You make me laugh every single day and make life that much sweeter than I ever thought it could be.
I have said this before, but you were a troubled baby. You cried and cried and cried and you basically hated life for about the first 4 months. You were hard and I felt like a failure. My only job at that time was to make you happy and considering the fact that you were never happy for more than a minute or two, I felt that I was not doing my job very well. You challenged me to slow down, to relax and to go with the flow - 3 things I made a point of never doing in the past. It was tough but we made it through. I am a better Mom because you pushed me so hard in those first few months and I owe much of your sister's ease to you.
Contrary to your general attitude as a baby, as a kid you are pretty much as easy at it comes. You are polite and kind and loving and you for the most part, follow the rules without too many issues. You do not push limits and you are a fun boy to be around. You share so well with other kids and I never worry about your behaviour in public. You are an easy kid to parent.
Over the past year we have watched you grow into a boy. There is nothing baby about you anymore. You vocabulary has exploded and every day you say a word that I had no idea you knew. Not that we didn't know your personality from the moment you were born, but this past year, it was truly solidified. If there is one thing that has been proven time and time again, it is that you cannot be rushed into anything. You do everything your way, and in your own time. The only saving grace of this equation is that you are also a huge copier of other kids. Watching another kid do something first is pretty much the only way to get you to try it as well, unless we want to wait about 8 months for you to warm to it on your own. That all being said, once you do something once, you are good to go for life. You do not need convincing more than once, however the first try is agonizingly difficult. For you and for me. Years ago, your Auntie Heather and I made the joke that we were torturing your cousin Cole with fun as he was not a fan of the splash pad. If that was the case with him, we have definitely tortured you with fun with splash pads, bouncy castles, bikes, boat rides and water guns. Yes, this trait in you can sometimes be very frustrating. At the end of the day though, I always remind myself that you will come to everything in time and just like your cousin did, you will face any challenge head on without a hesitation. All I can do in the mean time is encourage you to step outside your comfort zone, assure you that trying new things is good and fun and be there to celebrate with you and comfort depending on how the first try goes.
When I watch your three year birthday interview and then, immediately after watch the one we recorded when you turned two, it amazes me how much you have grown. Every new stage that we have entered with you has always been my new favorite and the one at present is no exception. Your endless energy amazes me and your love of life and everything in it reminds me just how special it is to be able to watch you through it all.
It has been three years (and a month and a half, due to the tardiness of this letter) since you came into our lives and I still look at you with amazement that you are my kid. I do not feel worthy of the responsibility that was entrusted in us when God made us your parents. You are so much like your father that it continually amazes me. I know that it is frustrating for him to watch you have the same frustrations and issues he had as a kid, but I know that this is just part of what makes you YOU. You are very much your own person, with your own quirks and traits that will both help and challenge you along the way. When you were a baby, we were in charge of pretty much doing one thing - keeping you alive. I guess we can say, 3 years later, that we were successful in that. Nowadays, yes, we still most definitely are in charge of still keeping you alive but our responsibility as parents goes much deeper than that. I feel like we are truly entering the stage where you will be formed as a person and that is not something I take lightly. I want nothing more than for you to be a strong, kind, caring, friendly person and know that every time I force you to say please, thank you and sorry, I am helping mould you into all of those things. I owe so much of me to my parents and hope that one day you will say the same. I promise that I will always do my best to help you, to challenge you and to support you and even though I am sure there will be times where I will drive you crazy, I hope that you will know deep down, that everything I do is for you and your sister. You are our worlds and you are our everythings and there is nothing that we wouldn't do for either of you.
I am not naive enough to think that there won't be a day that will come where you will not want to hug me as tight (or at all), kiss me goodnight, or bargain for more cuddling time before bed. For those reasons and about a million more, I know that I will look back on this three year old version of yourself and miss your innocence, your hilarity and above all your LOVE. I know that time will change, you will grow and you will need me less and less. That being said though, the LOVE, the love will never change. It is constant, it is the rock that remains through it all and no matter how big you get, how far away you are, or how far away you wish I was, it will remain forever and always.
When I ask you lately how much you love me, your answer is always "10, Mommy". In fact you love Daddy "10" too, but you only love Addy "1, because she is little". I will hold on to this answer for as long as I live as it makes my heart ache and keeps my soul full. You love for us is what makes all the craziness bearable, the ups of life so much sweeter and the downs that much easier to overcome. Just as you did as a baby, you continue to push me to be better, to be more patient and to truly enjoy what life has to offer. I owe you so much. You owe me a few hundred hours of lost sleep. Call it even?
Love you to the moon and back,
Happy Birthday x3, bub,
Mama
xoxo
Longer than I care to admit ago, you turned 3 years old. I am not sure why it took me so long to write this letter to you. In some ways, it's hard to find the words to describe how much we love you, but in others I could write page after page about all the funny, sweet, caring, crazy, and sometimes frustrating things you do and say on a daily basis. Through it all, at the end of each and EVERY day, you are still, by far, my bestest boy. You stole my heart the moment you were born and to this day you have yet to give it back. You make me laugh every single day and make life that much sweeter than I ever thought it could be.
I have said this before, but you were a troubled baby. You cried and cried and cried and you basically hated life for about the first 4 months. You were hard and I felt like a failure. My only job at that time was to make you happy and considering the fact that you were never happy for more than a minute or two, I felt that I was not doing my job very well. You challenged me to slow down, to relax and to go with the flow - 3 things I made a point of never doing in the past. It was tough but we made it through. I am a better Mom because you pushed me so hard in those first few months and I owe much of your sister's ease to you.
Contrary to your general attitude as a baby, as a kid you are pretty much as easy at it comes. You are polite and kind and loving and you for the most part, follow the rules without too many issues. You do not push limits and you are a fun boy to be around. You share so well with other kids and I never worry about your behaviour in public. You are an easy kid to parent.
Over the past year we have watched you grow into a boy. There is nothing baby about you anymore. You vocabulary has exploded and every day you say a word that I had no idea you knew. Not that we didn't know your personality from the moment you were born, but this past year, it was truly solidified. If there is one thing that has been proven time and time again, it is that you cannot be rushed into anything. You do everything your way, and in your own time. The only saving grace of this equation is that you are also a huge copier of other kids. Watching another kid do something first is pretty much the only way to get you to try it as well, unless we want to wait about 8 months for you to warm to it on your own. That all being said, once you do something once, you are good to go for life. You do not need convincing more than once, however the first try is agonizingly difficult. For you and for me. Years ago, your Auntie Heather and I made the joke that we were torturing your cousin Cole with fun as he was not a fan of the splash pad. If that was the case with him, we have definitely tortured you with fun with splash pads, bouncy castles, bikes, boat rides and water guns. Yes, this trait in you can sometimes be very frustrating. At the end of the day though, I always remind myself that you will come to everything in time and just like your cousin did, you will face any challenge head on without a hesitation. All I can do in the mean time is encourage you to step outside your comfort zone, assure you that trying new things is good and fun and be there to celebrate with you and comfort depending on how the first try goes.
When I watch your three year birthday interview and then, immediately after watch the one we recorded when you turned two, it amazes me how much you have grown. Every new stage that we have entered with you has always been my new favorite and the one at present is no exception. Your endless energy amazes me and your love of life and everything in it reminds me just how special it is to be able to watch you through it all.
It has been three years (and a month and a half, due to the tardiness of this letter) since you came into our lives and I still look at you with amazement that you are my kid. I do not feel worthy of the responsibility that was entrusted in us when God made us your parents. You are so much like your father that it continually amazes me. I know that it is frustrating for him to watch you have the same frustrations and issues he had as a kid, but I know that this is just part of what makes you YOU. You are very much your own person, with your own quirks and traits that will both help and challenge you along the way. When you were a baby, we were in charge of pretty much doing one thing - keeping you alive. I guess we can say, 3 years later, that we were successful in that. Nowadays, yes, we still most definitely are in charge of still keeping you alive but our responsibility as parents goes much deeper than that. I feel like we are truly entering the stage where you will be formed as a person and that is not something I take lightly. I want nothing more than for you to be a strong, kind, caring, friendly person and know that every time I force you to say please, thank you and sorry, I am helping mould you into all of those things. I owe so much of me to my parents and hope that one day you will say the same. I promise that I will always do my best to help you, to challenge you and to support you and even though I am sure there will be times where I will drive you crazy, I hope that you will know deep down, that everything I do is for you and your sister. You are our worlds and you are our everythings and there is nothing that we wouldn't do for either of you.
I am not naive enough to think that there won't be a day that will come where you will not want to hug me as tight (or at all), kiss me goodnight, or bargain for more cuddling time before bed. For those reasons and about a million more, I know that I will look back on this three year old version of yourself and miss your innocence, your hilarity and above all your LOVE. I know that time will change, you will grow and you will need me less and less. That being said though, the LOVE, the love will never change. It is constant, it is the rock that remains through it all and no matter how big you get, how far away you are, or how far away you wish I was, it will remain forever and always.
When I ask you lately how much you love me, your answer is always "10, Mommy". In fact you love Daddy "10" too, but you only love Addy "1, because she is little". I will hold on to this answer for as long as I live as it makes my heart ache and keeps my soul full. You love for us is what makes all the craziness bearable, the ups of life so much sweeter and the downs that much easier to overcome. Just as you did as a baby, you continue to push me to be better, to be more patient and to truly enjoy what life has to offer. I owe you so much. You owe me a few hundred hours of lost sleep. Call it even?
Love you to the moon and back,
Happy Birthday x3, bub,
Mama
xoxo
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Interview at 3.
Birthday letter to come, but for now, a simple interview with a 3 year old.
At least he didn't pretend to be asleep in the middle of it this year like last.
At least he didn't pretend to be asleep in the middle of it this year like last.
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